We got a placement!

Around 4:00pm, I got a call from our caseworker. She said she had two little black girls for us: Arianna was 2 years old and her baby sister Jocelyn was 7 months. They were completely healthy and needed to be placed in a home tonight!

I called Duffy - he said yes - called the caseworker - she said she'd set it up and call me back with a time. Immediately - my emotions and brain took turns shutting down. One minute, my brain would be working and I'd think of something that needed to be done: call Devi (my friend that's a nurse and a new mom), setup childcare for tomorrow, find someone to borrow bottles from, what do kids this age eat, I was supposed to teach Bible Study tonight and need to cancel that, will they come with vaccination records?  The next minute, an emotion would kick in and consume me: happiness, fear, excitement, anxiety. Mostly happiness. After years of wanting kids...this was the day it was going to happen for me. It felt surreal, wonderful, and scary all at the same time.

My coworkers had overheard my conversation and were buzzing about the hallways, sharing the news, and dropping by to offer calming words and advice. I wrapped up my work and headed out to get things ready at home. I had a plan: the baby would sleep in the pack-n-play and the toddler would sleep in the crib until we could get another toddler bed or crib. Devi was coming over to help me buy stuff (diapers, bottles, formula, etc.). I had the carseats and stroller - I was set.

As soon as I walked in the door at home I knew something was wrong...it smelled strongly of paint. I had taken a gallon of paint into the nursery to paint a dresser and when Duffy put the vacuum cleaner up, he'd accidentally knocked it over. A huge puddle of black (oil based) paint was pooled in the center of the baby's room. There was no way that the kids could use that room - or even be in that part of the house that night while it aired out.

The social worker called me back and told me that as they were finalizing the paperwork and loading up the car to make the drive from East Texas - another family in that region had surfaced. Since you legally have to keep the kids in the same region if at all possible - the other family got the girls. I was in shock, disappointed, relieved, and sad - all at the same time. Stress melted off of me as the paint puddle, lack of formula, stinky paint fumed house, and missing crib became problems that I no longer had to worry about.

Then the next round of to-do's caught up with me: call Duffy - call Devi - fix the paint puddle - prepare the lesson for Bible Study. After Bible Study we went ahead and made a run to Walmart to get all the things I had in my head: diapers, formula, toddler toys, food, juice, etc. If peace of mind meant buying every size diaper they had (just in case) then that's exactly what I wanted to do. Next time when they call, I'll be ready!